What the heck stands between me and my keyboard? I mean, what the hey!?!
When I was driving home from Bible study all these great ideas floated through my head. The minute I get home? Gone. Gone. Gone.
I folded clothes: this awesomely funny idea flitted around my head until a snazzy punchline made me snort and giggle. Sometime between blowing my nose and sitting at my keyboard? Gone. Idea is gone.
I know this comes as no surprise to other writers: writer's block sucks. I don't feel prepared to handle this. All the websites and blog posts I've read so far give writing exercises to break through.
Well, that's fine and dandy, but what do I do about the depression? The feeling of failure? Defeat? Or how about the stupidity that keeps flipping through my head?
I mean, I feel as creative as dog poo - and I'm pretty sure my dog can sculpt human faces as he dances around letting the poo drop. That means my dog possesses more creativity than I do. His poo appears far more artistic than my writing. Especially this blog piece.
The only thing that makes me feel better is that after I post this on Twitter, no one will bother to click on the link except bots.
22 bots, exactly. Every day my blog records 22 hits. 22 bots scan my blog for no reason whatsoever.
Well, I found one last Cadbury Creme Easter Egg at the bottom of my backpack. I'm going to eat it, enjoy it, and forget about writing.
Until I need to feel bad about myself again. Then I'll try to write again. And try to remember those kick-ass ideas that only seem to come when I'm up to my elbows scrubbing the shower.
Thank you for listening.